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Stop Seeking Balance

Balance. Something we are all told to seek. Balance work, school, home, kids, friends, exercise, you name it. There so many things that we are supposed to balance to be able to achieve a state of health and wellbeing. I know this is going to sound counterintuitive from a wellness coach, but what if this is the wrong way of thinking? Maybe you need to stop striving for balance?

When we strive for balance, we try to manage or control all the moving parts in our life. And we may find success doing that, for a while at least. But this is not sustainable. Life is not controllable. Eventually life changes will throw you off balance. Maybe you have a car that won't run, a parent that needs more help than you can give, a child that is struggling at school, you lose your job, there are so many things that can throw our balance out of balance in the blink of an eye. The only constant in life is change after all. And when life happens, we are thrown off balance, leaving us feeling like a failure.

So maybe the answer is not in seeking balance but in learning the skills to make constant micro-changes in life. The action of balancing. Noun versus verb doesn't seem like a drastic difference, but when you examine that a bit more closely you can see the profound impact of changing your lens from object to action word. Rather than creating a balance action plan for your life, instead try to pay close attention to your own micro-adjustments in your daily life to learn the action of (and art of) balancing.

The action of balancing is a skill that needs practice with intention. Let me demonstrate. Stand up, raise one foot off the ground. Hold it there. Pay close attention to what happens. When you really pay attention, you will notice that all of the little muscles, bones and tendons in your standing foot are slightly shifting almost constantly. The muscles, bones and tendons in your lower leg, knee and thigh tighten and gently move a bit forward, a bit backward, to the side in non-stop real time adjustments. Your lifted leg will shift slightly from side to side. Your belly will become engaged and tighten. All these micro-adjustments are your body's moment to moment balancing act to maintain your stance despite your footwear, the environmental conditions, and actions occuring around you. The more you practice standing on one foot, the more you practice the action of balancing, and the better you will become. It will become easier with each practice until your bodies just "does it" without thinking. Practicing the action of balancing can help you ride out the storms of life as they pop up, rather than feeling overwhelmed by "failing" at your work-life balance action plan.

Enjoy balancing friends



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